Guess Who's Coming To Dinner Tonight? (posted by Lani)

So, Jim is here, and spent yesterday working with our fabulous handyman Steve, putting up scaffolding on the back of the house and putting insulation and soffits under the eaves. They had talked about leaving the scaffolding up between the living room deck and the bedroom balcony, and I was opposed because we've been having Nocturnal Visitors, and I didn't want any of them getting trapped on the balcony and realizing that the only exit was either 20 feet down or -- through the bedroom. With me in it. I made them take the scaffolding down, despite the time and effort and pita factor, and they laughed at me. They shouldn't have laughed, because it was, as it turns out, a very good call.

You may recognize this as my kitchen window. You may recognize that as a bear. You would be correct in both cases. He looks so small and kinda cute in this picture, but he was neither small nor cute; he was quite large (two separate neighbors estimate 450-500 pounds), and quite impressive, and quite unafraid, and he apparently thought that he had a dinner invitation.

He started out on the deck, checking whether he could get to the balcony with the birdfeeders, and then whether he could get into the glass doors. He then moved on to check the kitchen windows, and then sat in the front yard and pouted for a while before moving on to annoy the neighbors.

I am currently contemplating a Rube Goldberg-esque setup on the deck where when unwanted visitors come up they will trip an alarm and a bright light will flash on, an airhorn will go off, and as many noisy items as I can find and rig up will fall down and make lots of noise. That, and I'm getting a gun this weekend. I think it's time.